


The Book

by Berocca



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Drama, M/M, dont know if this counts as action, happy new year, light fluff, maybe a little action
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-07 22:31:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5472944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Berocca/pseuds/Berocca
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU - Kakashi is caught at a young age and grown in Orochimaru's lab. How will he adapt to Konoha when he is rescued?</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Book

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Atsuki-hime (Atsuki_hime)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atsuki_hime/gifts).



> I was fortunate enough to get Atsuki-hime's request. She said I could do anything so I took that at face-value and went ahead to do this random Kakashi's point of view Kakairu brain vomit that I'd always wanted to do ever since I read the zombie apocalypse novel _The Girl With All the Gifts_ by M.R. Carey.
> 
> But this isn't zombies or anything fun like that. (i am sorry)
> 
> Happy New Years, everyone.  
> Thank you to the Kakairu mods who put up with my bullshit and thank you to my beta for putting up with my bullshit too and thank you to all the wonderful kakairu fans who read this. I hope you like it a little.

His name is Kakashi. It means “the scarecrow”, and since his skin is fair and his hair is stiff as straw, he thinks maybe it is a good name for him. He likes the name Inu a lot, because it means “the dog” and he likes dogs, but you don’t get to choose. The Master assigns a name to the new soldiers, and that is their name forever.

Kakashi can’t remember when he first got his name because it was a long time ago. It was when there used to be lots of new “flatmates,” as Yakushi puts it. The shuffles, clinks, the whirring of machines at night. An occasional scream. Then he would see a new face in the sleeping quarters, a new girl or a boy that hadn’t even learned to fight yet; that hadn’t got their bodies changed yet. But they got it fast.

Kakashi was one of the fastest to learn. He can’t even remember when he wasn’t holding some sort of weapon; the rough scars on his body a tribute to the amount of blood he has spilled over the years. He’s one of the strongest in here, he knows, and he has spilled at least fifty-seven times more enemy blood than his own.

Maybe if he keeps winning, he’ll get to see what a _giant, heaving bosom_ is like. The only ones he’s seen so far are strangely coloured, and not _heaving_ , per se, but more stuttered and fluttering, with blood pulsing out of the cuts he’s made.

But that’s not what it’s like in the Book. The Book describes gleaming, smooth skin, and granted, the bosom _is_ sometimes trembling, but it is always _in excitement_ ; _in anticipation_. He wonders if _excitement_ and _anticipation_ are what he feels when, sometimes during the Trials, he holds his screaming white fire in his hand. Though the way the Book puts it, Kakashi’s pretty sure those things are supposed to feel good and not like the emptiness he feels when his hand screams for more blood.

The Book is Kakashi’s most precious possession. It has no hard cover on it, like most of the books he’s seen Yakushi handle; and it has been thumbed so many times that the edges are feathery soft and the pages are frighteningly wrinkly. It is the only book Kakashi is allowed to read, and even that is because Yakushi doesn’t know he has it. It used to be circulated around the stronger flatmates, poked between the cell bars or the slits under the doors before Kakashi got a hold of it, and nobody is strong enough to challenge him for it back.

And it isn’t so precious only because of the great, heaving bosoms in it. The sky is blue, or grey, or black in the Book. Kakashi’s sleeping quarters are always the same colour of dark, and the Trial grounds are always a sickly orange. In the Book, there are princesses and lords and kings who touch each other without cutting, who talk without dying, who scream without hurting. Kakashi reads the words over and over again until they stop making sense, and closes his eyes to imagine being the handsome prince who gets to see the happily heaving bosoms.

It also helps him forget about the girl who taught him how to read through the bars of the opposite cell. She was one of the only flatmates he wanted to see again. It makes his chest hurt when he remembers that it was she who had snuck the Book from annoying Jinroku and gave it to him because she knew he needed it the most. She said he could keep it. She had told him he could keep it as she smiled, her teeth a bloody red above the hole in her bosom that Kakashi’s hand had made.

Kakashi knows he won’t make that mistake again. He won’t let Yakushi find out how much he doesn’t mind being around Tenzou or he might tell Yashagoro that too; and though Tenzou can handle himself well in a fight, he just won’t be able to win against Kakashi.

“Arrogant jackass,” Tenzou had said. But Kakashi is completely sincere. He does not want to feel the actual heart of another friend ever again, if he can help it.

That reminds him that it has already been three weeks since he’s seen Tenzou. Which wasn’t that strange, as he was Yashagoro’s favourite, and would often be in the laboratory tanks or in the Trial grounds, but something about Tenzou’s absence this time round makes Kakashi’s back itch and his hand burn.

Even the flatmates messed up by Yashagoro can feel something tense in the air. The fast footsteps of Yakushi as he makes the rounds at night, busy being Yashagoro’s assistant. The increasing frequency of the Trials, and a deepening silence every night.

Kakashi hopes Tenzou is okay.

It all comes to a head one day, when a giant monkey crashes backwards into the bars of his cell. Kakashi is barely fast enough not to have his head caved in by the force of the monkey’s black pole sticking in through the bent bars.

“Sarutobi! Do it now!” The monkey roars in a voice so loud that it hurts Kakashi’s eardrums.

“Enma!”

Kakashi briefly hears the call before a series of explosions shake the ground, and Kakashi can’t see nor block the chunk of ceiling that falls onto the back of his head, knocking him out just as his vision turns white.

*

Kakashi opens his eyes to brightness. For a second he thinks he is still knocked out, but then he realizes that that’s stupid because if he was still knocked out, he wouldn’t be having these thoughts in the first place.

The light is so bright that he almost forgets to reach for a weapon, but it turns out he needn’t have bothered. His arms are strapped at an oddly comfortable distance from his body, and he is lying on a bitter-smelling white bed in a room easily twice the size of his cell.

Kakashi is smart, so he gives up trying to pull out of the strange restraints for the time being. They’re much tougher than they looked. It would be better to scope out his new surroundings for any possible escape or defensive positions first.

“You’ll be free to leave once your treatment has finished,” says a voice to his right.

It startles Kakashi and he snaps his head around to his side.

A man stands next to the bed, and it’s a huge surprise that he was able to get so close without Kakashi noticing, even given the fact that he had just woken up. Was it a trick of Yashagoro? Who else could be unnoticed by him apart from Yashagoro?

But this man is as unlike Yashagoro as anyone could ever be.

The voice, first of all, was rich and full, sending all the hair on Kakashi’s arms to stand and quiver. His clothes are brightly coloured with dark green and night blue, and the skin of his forearms and throat and face are a brilliant brown.

The man clears his throat and glances out the window on Kakashi’s other side and his dark eyes flicker around a bit quickly. Tenzou had told him before that his staring could be super unnerving. And Kakashi had just been staring, unblinking, taking in the man from legs to his face.

“What’s your name?” Kakashi asks. It is the only thing he wants to know.

The man makes a little sound, a little chuckle. Kakashi decides that it is a very pleasing sound.

“Sorry, I should have said it first. My name is Iruka,” says Iruka. “I’m going to be your companion for the next few weeks.”

“Iruka.” It was definitely a cool name. Not like his one. Maybe he should introduce himself as Inu instead of his real name. But was it strange, being called Inu? But then again, his name was Iruka so –

“Yes, Kakashi-san.”

Kakashi’s eyes jump up to catch the dark brown ones again, at the sound of his name in that voice.

“You are well-known here. Can I tell you about the things you really should have been asking first?” Iruka’s voice, Kakashi notes, is full of variations in tone. This one seems amused, and Kakashi cocks his head slightly.

Iruka looks away and stifles another chuckle, and Kakashi is inordinately pleased with himself.

The high cheekbones of the other man redden a little and Iruka clears his throat. Kakashi is interested to note that there is nothing to clear, because his voice is not clouded at all as he coughed.

“You’re in a hospital in Konoha. This is a village where you will be safe and you will never have any experiments done on you. I will be your companion and my duties are to help you adjust to our village’s everyday life and assist you in making you feel safe and comfortable,” says Iruka.

“Everyday life?”

“Yes. That would be things like reading and writing if you need it, earning money and buying necessities like food and clothes. The Sandaime Hokage, who is the leader of this village, has given you an apartment and you will be able to live there once you feel ready enough.” Kakashi likes the way Iruka looks directly at him when he’s explaining. It makes his gut slowly clench; and it’s almost like he was being tested on by Yashagoro again, but different in that this time it feels good.

“Am I the only one?”

Iruka’s eyes fall from Kakashi’s face, briefly.

“I’m sorry. We couldn’t find any other survivors from Orochimaru’s defensive blast apart from you and another young man named Kinoe.”

Kakashi’s diaphragm relaxes at that.

“He prefers to be called Tenzou,” informs Kakashi. He’s sure Tenzou won’t mind Iruka knowing his name. He hated being called Kinoe, after all.

Iruka looks surprised, then his eyes crinkle in another smile.

“Thank you for telling me. I’ll bring him here later. He woke up yesterday and is coping really well, though we kept you apart because we thought- we didn’t know how you were going to react.”

Kakashi smiles at Iruka, and he thinks that if he can make Iruka smile, he will learn the crap out of everyday life skills.

*

Tenzou is talking when Kakashi wakes up again. Tenzou is obviously having fun with someone, and Kakashi then sees that that someone is Iruka by the windowsill.

“So you’re still alive after all, Tenzou.”

Kakashi’s attempt to shut Tenzou up a little backfires when they both laugh at him, though Iruka’s laugh is most definitely easier on the ears.

“Says the man with the extra skull on his head,” Tenzou snorts.

Kakashi gingerly brings his hand up to his head and sure enough, there is a lump the size of his fist. And with that revelation comes a matching-sized headache.

“…Ow.”

Iruka quickly walks over to him and gently touches his shoulder, and Kakashi reacts without his pounding brain ever catching up.

Screaming white is in his hand and it is barely inches from Iruka’s face, Iruka’s shock lit up by the crackling sparks of electricity.

The thing that had stopped Iruka’s face becoming a mess of blood and bone was a vine of shadow wrapped around his arm, stemming from one of the two men in the entrance.

“Thank you, Shikaku,” says the short, old man.

“Hokage-sama.” Iruka’s face retreats beyond the licks of Kakashi’s hand, and Kakashi is grateful for it.

Kakashi forces the light back into his hand, and his pale, fleshy palm stares back up at him, looking as though it didn’t have a bloodthirsty demon just under its surface.

“Thank you, Shikaku,” says Kakashi.

The tension suddenly lifts with Iruka’s hastily muffled laugh. The old man coughs, and even Shikaku hides a grin. Tenzou shoots him an exasperated look.

“Kakashi-san. Can you control your chakra?” asks the old man.

The chakra isn’t the problem for Kakashi. It’s what’s inside his chakra, the demon inside him that’s the problem.

“I…thought I could. I usually can, but when Iruka touched me it just reacted.”

Shikaku shares a glance with a third, blond man behind him who is half-hidden by the shadow of the doorway. The old man nods, and turns to Tenzou.

“How are you feeling, Tenzou?”

“Why is he addressed by his name when you put a - _san_ after mine?”

Iruka coughs again, and Kakashi thinks that Iruka would be a terrible ninja if that was his attempt at hiding his laugh.

Tenzou sends one of his creepy glares at him and pointedly answers the old man.

“I am feeling much better, Hokage-sama, thanks to Iruka-san’s care. I am able to walk and I can gather my chakra at will.”

Kakashi stares at Tenzou, and thinks maybe he is sounding a little too smug. Iruka doesn’t notice though, and smiles at Tenzou. He needs to tell Iruka about the time Tenzou fell over in one of the flatmate’s blood and hit his face on a dead body’s butt. Tenzou hates that story and it makes Kakashi laugh a lot, but it suddenly occurs to Kakashi that maybe Iruka might not find it as funny.

“That’s good. You can be discharged in the afternoon, and Iruka and Anko will take you to your new lodgings,” said the Hokage.

“Iruka told me that he would be with me.”

“Stop interrupting, senpai.”

“Old man’s finished talking. I wasn’t interrupting.”

The blond man near the doorway barely hides a laugh and Shikaku mutters, “old man.”

“Iruka will be your instructor as well as Tenzou’s until he deems you both fit enough to not require his assistance,” says the Hokage. “Kakashi-san, or Kakashi if you prefer it, I am surprised that you haven’t asked any other questions about where or why you are here.”

“Iruka already told me that this was Konoha, and that I’m going to learn how to be a cook or a dog-trainer. I’m interested in what sort of lodgings I’m going to get if this fancy room is just a hospital.”

Iruka looks surprised and a little mortified, as he says, “Kakashi-san, I –“

Kakashi stares at Iruka’s face. “I thought we were sticking to Kakashi without the san.”

Iruka shows a sign of exasperation when he answers. “I did not say cook or dog-trainer. I meant integration into our village community.” The twinge of red on his cheeks makes Iruka cute when he is annoyed.

The Hokage interrupts, “As interesting as it is to hear what your plans are for the future, I would like to talk to you first anything you remember about Orochimaru.”

“Okay.” It would be great if he knew who they were talking about. “Who’s Orochimaru?”

Everyone looks at him in disbelief, but Tenzou comes to his aid.

“It’s their name for Yashagoro, senpai. It seems Yashagoro is his first name, before he became the psycho he was when he was keeping us prisoner.” Kakashi thinks it’s hilariously unsettling that Yashagoro ever had a childhood, or that they had all called him by that name even as he mutilated them all.

“Orochimaru is his name now. After his defection from Konoha, they started calling him Orochimaru because of his bond with snakes, and they thought it seemed way more fitting, too.”

Tenzou turns to face the men in the doorway again. “Senpai was there a long time before I was caught. I’m not sure how long…”

Kakashi thinks it’s none of their business how young he was when Orochimaru got him. He doesn’t even know, after all and their stares are getting irritating. The coursing current underneath his skin jumps.

Iruka’s voice gently interrupts. “My apologies, Hokage-sama, Shikaku-san and Inoichi-san. It is time for Tenzou-san to leave the hospital. Please excuse me.”

“See you later, senpai.” Tenzou looks at him with unreadable eyes. “Don’t… be stupid.”

Kakashi watches Iruka bow, and his shoulders slouch involuntarily as he sees Iruka’s retreating form.

Shikaku’s shadow slowly retreats, and leaves Kakashi’s hands bound only by the restraints attached to the bed.

“What happened to Yasha- I mean, Orochimaru?” Dark walls, iron-tinged scent, the low, smug hiss of a voice. Kakashi isn’t so sure that it will be gone forever.

“He blew up the whole compound and we couldn’t catch him. We think he is currently north near the coast, but it isn’t definite. It took us years to find that lab where you were at, after all.”

The old man looks at him for a long moment. Kakashi can see the sadness clear in his eyes, and even he can see that it doesn’t belong there. He wishes he could do something to help it go away.

“Kakashi, if you are willing, we can send you to sleep and let Inoichi help you remember the things in your past. It is invasive of your privacy, but I hope you understand that this is a process that needs to happen to ensure the protection of the village.”

“From me?”

“I’m afraid so. You are a strong young man with impressive stores and ability to handle chakra. If you are not willing to go through this procedure, there are other options through which you can tell us information about yourself, your strengths and weaknesses, and of Orochimaru.”

“That would take longer, though.”

“Having your permission to go through your mind would be faster, yes.”

Kakashi hesitates. It isn’t as though he hasn’t had anything more invasive than a mental probe before. But the things he has done; the blood of others he has spilt would fill up rooms in this hospital. How can anyone hide that forever? Iruka probably has never seen anything like it. It’s a good thing, Kakashi supposes, that this is out in the open before Iruka forms more of a good opinion of him.

“Sure, go ahead.”

Kakashi closes his eyes and he feels a cool hand darken his forehead.

*

“…amazing how little all the information is compartmentalized. It’s a wonder that he can function without snapping at all.”

“So you think he should be held at a security unit?”

“That would be for the best. But his conditioning and programming is hard to understand. I can’t tell what his triggers are.”

“It is too much to hope that Orochimaru wouldn’t have put in a trigger.”

“Yes, it is.”

It must not be obvious that he is awake. Kakashi opens his eyes.

The men’s conversation halt immediately and Kakashi receives their full attention, a little like the attention he would get whenever he was on the Trial grounds.

“Kakashi, how are you feeling?” asks the Hokage.

“Like I’ve had an old man digging around in my closet,” answers Kakashi. “A little weirded out and annoyed.”

The masked man in the corner of the room muffles a laugh, though Kakashi wonders why he even bothers to hide it.

“Why are you wearing a mask, Iruka?”

The Hokage laughs loudly at that. Kakashi didn’t think it was that funny; but, whatever floats his boat.

“Your laugh does give you away.”

Iruka sheepishly lifts his mask and hangs it from the side of his head. It makes him look like one of the suave samurai in the Book.

“You can wear the mask if you want to, Iruka.” Kakashi says quickly before Iruka gets the wrong idea that he’s laughing at him. “You must be training to be a ninja, if you need help controlling your emotions.”

The group of three men by the Hokage laugh as though it’s the funniest thing they’ve ever heard and Kakashi immediately kicks himself because Iruka’s face is going red with embarrassment. Kakashi never meant for that to happen and he can feel himself desperate and lost for words.

The Hokage chuckles, “Iruka is already a very capable ninja, Kakashi. But you did pick up immediately on his weak point; he will have to thank you for proving that he needs more practice in that area.”

A man Kakashi hasn’t seen before steps forward, next to Kakashi’s bed. The shadow he casts is huge. The scars on his face are bigger and crueller than the ones on Shikaku’s, but Kakashi can see that the eyes aren’t as steely as they themselves think they are.

“Good evening, Kakashi. My name is Morino Ibiki, and I will be with you when you leave the hospital and accompanying you in your transition period.”

Kakashi’s head whips over to Iruka of its own accord. “Iruka?”

But Ibiki continues to speak, his gruff voice grating on Kakashi’s nerves.

“Umino Iruka has another task that requires his –“

“Respectfully, sir, I think I should be with Kakashi during his transition period,” Iruka interrupts. “I have read up on his files and even more than Tenzou, he needs to see the things that are good about Konoha in order to successfully integrate into normal society. He cannot achieve that in the confines of T & I’s cell blocks.”

“This is for Kakashi’s protection as well as your own,” barks Ibiki. The scars on his face move as he talks but they eerily don’t betray the anger that is present in his voice. “We don’t know how deep a trigger has been buried in his mind, or what exactly the extent of his abilities are. It needs to be thoroughly understood before attempting any sort of rehabilitation or training –“

“You will _not_ be using him as a shinobi!” Iruka yells straight back, his eyes wide in alarm and matching fire. The plain mask trembles on the side of his head with the force of his loud baritone and the muscles under the thin clothing bunch in outrage; outrage for something Kakashi doesn’t quite understand.

But it is easy to understand that Iruka is angry. Not at Kakashi but at Ibiki, which makes Kakashi’s chest thump hastily in exaltation. He is _protecting_ Kakashi, as though he deserves to be protected. Iruka is fighting for Kakashi – and it is so easy to understand for Kakashi that Iruka is the most beautiful man in the world.

“I’m sorry that I don’t have a great bosom.”

Silence doesn’t happen straight away, but slowly comes into the room, just as the words sink in past the loud voices.

The Hokage mutters an “excuse me” and exits the room, and Shikaku has to use his shadow trick to squeeze Inoichi’s violently trembling throat that is bursting to laugh.

Ibiki’s face gains colour underneath the surface skin, slowly and blotchily turning his face red as his jaw muscles work hard to clench his mouth shut. Ibiki has to turn away to hide the snort that forms without his permission.

And Iruka just looks at him and smiles, straight at him. Kakashi is ecstatic. This is the reward he gets for having been tortured since he can’t even remember; the reward that life has given him for persevering and not just letting everything go.

“Kakashi, I think you’ve proven my point perfectly,” says Iruka, and Kakashi delights in his name in that voice again. “…Though I can’t figure out what you mean by that.”

Kakashi can, at least, explain this. “You’re protecting me. You look like a prince, you are dressed like a hero, and to me, you’ve rescued me from the cell. And now you’re protecting me again; it’s obvious that I must be your princess like the ones in the Book, though I’m sorry I don’t have a great, heaving, smooth bosom.”

Shikaku excuses himself too and Inoichi is left free to choke out painful-sounding chortles.

“I… I- Kakashi, I think, I mean,” Iruka clears his throat and looks at the wall behind Kakashi’s head. He ignores Inoichi’s gurgles and starts to speak, face still a bright red.

“The Hokage was originally going to have me with you and Tenzou-san together to make the introduction and integration easier, and of course we would have a highly skilled guard watching us for any problems. I am sure Hokage-sama will approve this original plan over Ibiki-san’s plan for you to be locked in another cell, knowing that you are one from Konoha’s most loyal clans and this is what you deserve as the person you are.”

The Hokage had arrived back in the room like a ghost again. “Iruka.”

Iruka looks down. “I’m sorry, Hokage-sama.”

“Hn. I am trusting your judgment. You have the charge of Kakashi. Report back tomorrow for progress. Dismissed.”

*

When everyone had left, Kakashi can’t help but ask.

“What did you mean, Iruka?”

“The cells in T & I are much bigger and of course, they wouldn’t be putting you in a prisoner cell, but I still think you shouldn’t be separated from Tenzou-san –“

“I meant about the clan thing. Do I have a clan?”

Iruka looks at him and answers slowly.

“You did, Kakashi. Your clan died when you were declared missing in action at the age of four. Your father died honourably in grief. You clan name is Hatake.”

Kakashi rolls the new information around in his head. To think that he had a clan, a _father_ ; that he wasn’t just a monster pet of Orochimaru’s. Kakashi feels rage and sadness fighting each other in the river of his blood; but then he forces himself to look at Iruka, who is standing there holding clothes for Kakashi. Looking lost and sad, but as sweet as a little prince in the rain.

“Thank you. It makes sense.”

Kakashi nods and stands up. He is not stupid enough not to realize that he is fortunate that he has found all of this again.

*

The very next day, Iruka trains them through basic chakra training, including all the jutsu that Kakashi already knew from instinct, because it turns out Tenzou and Kakashi have highly sought after chakra abilities that warrant their learning of self defense. Iruka is adamant that they will not be used for sending them out into active duty, though Kakashi has a feeling that some other people, like Ibiki, has different ideas.

Tenzou is a textbook-perfect goody two shoes. He executes the simplest jutsu all the way to the most complicated ones that they have learnt so far, exactly as Iruka tells them, and gets all the praise.

Kakashi can do all of that and more, but he can’t yet seem to summon his clan dogs, and that is really throwing him off his game. That he has a clan, that the clan’s summons are dogs, and that he’s supposed to have a pack of eight of them, _all_ his own. At the sound of another wood jutsu, creating a bridge over a large stream, Kakashi scowls as he bends over the summoning scroll.

“This is harder to work with than the Book,” he says under his breath.

“That’s because this one isn’t about throbbing members,” smirks Tenzou from the top of his shitty little bridge.

“Or maybe it’s because some idiot is distracting me, showing off his wood ability, probably to compensate for the lack of wood down-“

A wave of wood bursts from the ground, sending Kakashi jumping through the air just in time, clutching his scroll. Wordlessly, he makes a rapid series of hand seals and he can see Tenzou doing the same thing.

Iruka ignores their exchange as he walks towards their backpacks on the edge of the training field. By the time he walks back, the training field is already a mess of charred wood and irregularly spaced tree trunks. A flurry of fingers and a well-timed jutsu brings a wave of water from the stream crashing onto their heads, and they turn to look at him, amidst the steam and the slow tendrils of acrid smoke.

“Kakashi-san, I should tell you that the Book you keep mentioning is from Konoha, and the author is a Konoha shinobi. He has written five so far, and what you possess is his first book.”

Iruka held up a small, orange book.

“This is the next in the series. If I can see you working hard with your own scroll and not bothering Tenzou-san, I will gift it to you.”

It is all Kakashi can do at that moment to remain standing on the pile of wet wood.

*

“Basic chakra use is stable, and higher level jutsus are also not an issue. I believe the incident at the hospital was just his fast survival instincts more than a trigger for an attack on the village.”

“I see. For now, we will continue to keep your team under surveillance. For their protection as much as ours.”

“Yes, sir.”

*

The early evenings are spent with Iruka. Sometimes he is late from his day job as a teacher of small ninja children, and Kakashi can easily spot the days Iruka has less energy than others.

The tired droop of his eyelids, the over-tight ponytail; the tensed shoulders make Kakashi want to wrap him in the blanket that he bought the other day, a nice green with a cool shuriken pattern, and watch his face relax over a cup of hot tea.

On the days Iruka comes back from a talk with his superiors about Kakashi, his eyebrows are drawn tight in a worried frown, and his eyes carry a sadness that Kakashi’s hand twitches in its earnestness to blast away.

But the move into his apartment, with Tenzou in the next block – the asshole said he didn’t want to be _too_ close – had been very smooth, his neighbours and the Konoha citizens all welcoming him with curiosity and respectful consideration.

And now that he has devoured all the books he could find written by his favourite author, Jiraiya-sama, Kakashi ends up spending most of his time loitering around the village; his favourite places being the memorial stone, which has so many names that mean nothing to him but must mean something to someone, and the thick trees outside his apartment or the Hokage Tower.

He reads Icha Icha volume 3 through the light that is being thoughtfully blocked by the thick leaves, and his mind wanders half to Iruka, who is teaching in the classroom below, and half to the village that is protecting Kakashi like a damsel in a tower.

He doesn’t mind being the princess, but he thinks can feel a flaw in the plots with the locked up ladies. They have so much beauty and creativity and intelligence, but to be locked up by something as unfairly impenetrable as a bloody firebreathing dragon must surely drive them apeshit insane. He wouldn’t put it past anyone in that sort of situation, if it was real, to start drawing with their blood on the walls and making a miniature Hidden Village with hair and spit.

This peace is not what he is used to, and his hand keeps itching to burst into lightning again. Tenzou doesn’t seem to have that urge, and he walks around town, giving flowers out of his hand to the little children, and scoring some heavy points with questionably single men and women.

He flexes his hand, and was that a crackle? No, it must be his imagination. He takes a deep breath, and releases it slowly.

It was time for a walk. Or maybe to try to find a job like Tenzou has already done. Staying near Iruka when he is busy doesn’t help Kakashi calm down.

Kakashi stands, and takes another deep breath. His hand twinges, releasing a spark of charge and a little screech, like the sounds the birds or the children are making below.

“Kakashi-san!” calls Iruka from the base of the tree. “What a nice surprise to see you here. Have you had lunch?” Iruka shields his eyes with one hand against the midday sun, and Kakashi hides his twinging hand behind his back.

“Lunch? Ah, not yet, I was actually just –“

“Oh good, I packed too much today, why don’t we share? Come join me,” says Iruka, his face alight with the sun and the children’s smiles.

Kakashi can’t refuse, and he walks slowly down the tree trunk, not knowing the cause of the dread forming in his stomach.

He wants to be down there with Iruka, he knows. He wants to be there with the children who only barely reach his chest, who look at him with curious, large, sparkling eyes. He wants to talk with them and laugh with them and touch their hair as Iruka does, and he wants to hold Iruka’s hand and touch him with his hands and his face and his whole body.

Then he freezes, halfway down the tree trunk. His hand clenches, and a loud spark comes out of his fingers.

Iruka is alarmed. “Kakashi-san?” He starts towards him, and his hand reaches out.

“Don’t!” Kakashi screams. “Don’t touch me!”

Iruka stops moving, but he’s so close. He staggers back but his mind is exploding, his stiff legs don’t work properly and he falls onto the grass. The children mill around his crouched form, and he can hear Iruka loudly directing them inside the building but the children ask and yell and question and dawdle, and all he wants to do is…

“Go away!” he groans. “Go away go away go away!”

The children scramble around in a blur.

“Go away, or I’ll rip all of you!” Kakashi yells, his voice hoarse. He is desperate. His head feels light, and the surroundings sort of fade away and then come back again without moving. His hand sparks of its own accord. His eyes focus on Iruka and on the blurs around him.

Kakashi is scrabbling on the edge of a dark, bottomless pit, and he is slipping on the crumbling edges of the inevitable fall.

“Doton Kekkai!”

“Mushi Kabe no jutsu.”

“Kuchiyose no jutsu!”

A multitude of chakra and jutsu erupt clouds of smoke, levelling a large portion of the buildings near Kakashi. Village citizens run away from the enormous snake crushing the buildings, and Kakashi can vaguely recognize himself dodging and blocking weapons and attacks by instinct, his mind still an explosive haze drowned by the exalted screaming of a thousand birds in his hand, free at last.

There is a clash of steel and he only just manages to avoid being gutted by a knife held by a bronze arm. Kakashi is struggling with the urge to fight and protect god knows what, and his senses are disoriented and he lashes out-

His clumsy, tortured movements are easily caught and pinned down under the ground by Iruka.

There are screams and explosions outside.

“Kakashi, there is a group of unmarked ninja outside of this barrier, using snake summons and sound skills. I don’t know what Anko and the others are thinking by attacking you, but I know if it wasn’t for you, the snake would have killed at least half of my class. Orochimaru’s not here, I don’t know if he’s coming. Just stay here, stay out of the way, I’ll protect you.” Iruka rushes his words, urgency sparking in his eyes, but Kakashi feels it through a dim barrier, as if a blanket of oil is covering him and he is on fire.

“Kakashi, can you hear me?” says Iruka, shaking Kakashi’s stiff shoulders.

Kakashi’s hand screams for Iruka’s blood, for any blood, to feel the heart beat its last convulsions in his palm but his mind has a leash on it, for now. “Iruka,” Kakashi moans. “You need to leave.”

But Iruka is ripped out of the earth barrier by a snake head, and, almost curiously, the briefest glimpse of the giant snake’s violet eyes makes everything that was whirling in his mind fall into place.

He remembers all the things he was put through, the tests and trials.

And finally, the permeating conditioning to kill, especially the children or small test subjects, is successfully located in his mind.

_“Hiruzen’s cherished future will burn, Kakashi,” he hisses, his slit-pupiled eyes glinting gleefully._

And Kakashi shutters it firmly closed.

The writhing white monster in his blood is leashed, for now; and as Kakashi leaps up to chase the head of the snake who has Iruka, he thinks he finally has a purpose strong enough to have it be submissive forever.

Iruka stabs with his left hand, his strength failing as his ribs are pierced with the creature’s fangs, and Kakashi sets both his screaming birds and his clan pack loose onto the enemy.

“Kuchiyose, Doton Tsuiga no Jutsu!”

He knew they would come, before he even made the first hand seal. This time, different to all the times he tried during training, he can feel his purpose, his desperation and the blood of his clan ripping through his chakra pathways.

The vicious pack of eight dogs follow his absolute orders. The group of Orochimaru’s ninja are brutally hunted down, just as Kakashi’s hand is finally allowed to drink the blood of the giant snake.

It is over in a few minutes.

In retrospect, the might of Konoha, with a Hatake leader back in its ranks, is maybe overkill for the group of Orochimaru’s abandoned ninja. The trigger to kill, that Kakashi had eventually contained, had summoned the group and the snake, but Orochimaru and his Yakushi were nowhere to be seen.

The Konoha team are ruthless and efficient, and Tenzou’s barricade and Ibiki’s team have all the invaders caught and unconscious before the village citizens have finished evacuating.

But Kakashi is only interested in the man in his arms.

“Don’t worry, Kakashi-san. It actually grazed the outside of my ribs, not all the way through my gut,” says Iruka weakly. That he still can manage to smile through the blood slowly soaking Kakashi’s clothes is a blessing as well as an alarm.

“Okay. I’ll just get this part off before it gets caught in your wound.” Kakashi carefully cuts away the ruined fabric of Iruka’s vest and shirt, and notes with relief that what Iruka said was true.

Kakashi controls his chakra to his feet perfectly, and slowly walks down the slope of the giant snake’s body, holding Iruka so that he would lose as little blood as possible before he arrives at the hospital.

Iruka, though, stiffens slightly in his position between Kakashi’s two arms.

“Anko…” he groans in the general direction of the group of ninja standing in front of the Tower.

“I won’t say anything,” says the purple-haired ninja, though the voice is shot full of adrenaline and menacing glee. “I won’t say that you look like a pretty princess.”

Kakashi looks down at the hoarsely yelling man in his hold.

“Don’t worry,” says Kakashi, as they reach everyone in the Tower and start moving towards the hospital.

“Your bosom is perfect.”

*


End file.
